Monday, June 29, 2009

My Sunday Bloopers

Well, this past Sunday is what the Spaniards call, "LOCO!" My cousin was in town and was going to meet me at Church at 11:00 am. Lane was working that morning so I was cruising around and multi-tasking like a chimp. I just cannot seem to conquer it. I see a gnat and say, 'A gnat!' It's not that bad; I hope. Exaggeration folks! Well, I got out the door at 11:00 am instead of being at the Church at 11 am. I'm cruising down the road I like to call the 'I-tardy'.
Then I remember I have a movie due back at Blockbuster at noon. Curse them for their new 2 day policy. They take the 48 hours seriously! Now I have an errand I have to do or be penalized. The only thing to help this situation is speed like demon. I'm cruising to Mckenzie Towne when a cop steps onto the road and waves me to pull over. I should've floored it and faced the consequences later. Kidding! It wasn't Lane and this guy looked big and tough. As I rolled down my window and waited I started to sweat and began thinking of my pathetic plea I was going to give. I've been practising my speech for years now and all of a sudden it seemed really retarded. 'Officer, I should've known better! My husband is a police officer.'

I look at him guilty and then's Lane's partner! He said he was all excited because before he knew it was me he thought he was going to get a good one (if that explains how fast I was going). Then I hear Lane's laughing. He was in the second unmarked car beside his partner's police car. I was a joke to liven their day when they realize it's 'Trim's wife'.

I got off with a warning and continue on after being pulled over by the coppers. I pull up to Blockbuster and practically leap off my seat. Unfortunately, I am still a chub-chub from the baby and was wearing a jean skirt that was too tight. I had no feeling left in my butt so how was I to gauge where it swings?! I hit the door lock. I realized it before it was too late but this van is still new to me and as I was in a haste and couldn't find the unlock button fast enough, I just left the door open. As I took a few steps to the other side of the vehicle to get the movie out, my door closed! Locked out of the van with the two kids inside! Oh no! I ask Porter to open the door but he's strapped in, never opened a van door and laughing hysterically. No help at all. I can't remember Lane's number in his car. I go into Blockbuster and start using their phone and call the same three friends a few times each. I finally start leaving messgaes that go a little something like this, 'This is Stacey. I am stranded at Blockbuster and locked out of my car. I know you probably think you have a late movie because it's Blockbuster but you don't...I think. Please pick up your phone!'

Nobody picks up. I finally call the police station and get someone who will give me Lane's number. Then I call Lane and he leaves his post to come unlock the van for me.
As he unlocks the van from his car I can see him giving me a thumbs up for encouragement but the embarassment is shining through. Now his partner who just pulled me over hears I just locked myself out of the car. But I swear I am a genius!

I made it to Church at the ripe time of 11:45. My cousin thought she was in the wrong ward. Thankfully, she stuck it out and waited. In the end, we crowned the day with a warm bowl of Mac n'cheese and then the world became right again. The end.


Krymsen said...

you are so freaking hilarious Stacey! I have locked my kids in the van before. But luckily Rebecca knew how to get out of her seat.

kimara said...

Stacey entertaining as always! Poor you I hate days like that. You are stinkin lucky that it was Lane that pulled you over the turkey!